All I've ever wanted to do in life is right
Maybe you should learn how to spell write first
So, just so you know... Your vasectomy worked.
bonus
the pizza man had no reaction when jackie and me opened the door naked, i guess he's used to that shit
in retrospect, i probably shouldn't have referred to his dick as "travel size"
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
Yeah but he's impersonating a gargoyle jumping off of everything. Including the walls.
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
It feels like my uterus is trying to crawl out of my ass wearing cleats. And yourself?
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
Summary of my night: made out with a complete stranger at a club dressed in the Geico gecko costume...
I'm way too hungover for life right now
Randomize
