i feel like after you turn 30 you aren't supposed to black out anymore
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
but i have a bet that her boyfriend is going to try and deflower her tonight so i better get a move on if i want to videotape it
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
he actually used the line "do you have a map, because i'm lost in your eyes" and i was to drunk to care
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
we got hammered off table wine and i ended up biting my acrylic nail off so i could finger his butt.. ill never look at valentines day the same
found inexpensive tickets to Norway. Questioning if its legal. PLEASE tell me you remebered the walkie talkies and face paint.
She's running around bumping into to people trying to keep a balloon she filled with vodka in the air. Please tell me she has a secret off switch you didn't tell me about.
I want to apologize but I don't know how. Do I just say "sorry for OD'ing on your couch"? I think that just sounds weird.
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
MY GOD DAMN TV STOPS WORKING EVERY TIME I AM THIS FUCKING HIGH. WHY MUST IT TORMENT ME?!
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize