It was like a Michael Bay sized explosion located in my pussy.
Been considering the feasibility of adopting a kangaroo. Yes I'm very serious. And yes I'm very high.
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
you say it like running around in your thong wasted is a bad thing
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
He stopped mid-sex to read the subtitles on a Korean movie we had playing in the background.
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
I'm watching the World Cup in bed naked with john and our USA flag aviator glasses. Can you say America?
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
You seem to be avoiding the poop question. How did you poop on your hand?
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
I just woke up with a pair of handcuffs in my pants, can u explain this?
Randomize
