mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
We tried to get a ride from the same firefigters that were turning off the fire alarm going off at our house.
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
I know for sure he's a bro because he closed the door so my gf didn't see me hooking up with her cousin.
Im just a social blackout drinker.
do you remember the random banging on my door at 3 am wearing 2 budlight cases as a dress
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
$1 drinks and Playboy theme. I am never leaving this place
She's cool and all but if she eats my food again I'm gonna fucking drop kick her ass. No one touches my lunchables. NO ONE.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
my dad just liked my status about my bowl being stolen even he feels my pain
Randomize
