yo - did your mom get a boob job (I think she did)
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
i can tell by the sound of your bed that he isnt that good at sex.
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
This is working out surprisingly well considering it started out with us using a christmas tree as a battering ram
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
He said to me this morning that we should finish these beers, go and get plan B then on the way back, go to the pub to celebrate the death of our baby. I love Manchester.
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Someone messaged me on POF and wished me a Happy International Women's Day. Why do I even bother anymore?
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
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