operation harelip BJ is a go
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
I don't care if my next phone has to run on the blood of virgin koala bears, I don't want to be scrambling for a charger.
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
Randomize
