Went to bed at 4 in a strangers bed. woke up wearing scrubs, realized i was gonna be late for work so i just wore the same clothes as the day before... i don't have a toothbrush and im pretty sure there is leftover semen in my mouth. at some point i think i was at the beach cuz theres is sand in my underwear. i love newport already.
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
i love that you felt the need to clarify that you don't actually have drugs in your vagina.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
the girl next to me at the bar JUST looked down at her vagina and said "im going to get you fed". if i come home alone tonight...i give you permission to cut off my penis
I fell asleep to him stroking my ass calling it his precious.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
I walk in and my roomie is fucking her bf while wearing lingerie and minnie mouse ears. Right in the childhood.
I just want to make out with him forever
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
My mom added me on Snapchat which means I am officially done with Snapchat.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
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