Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
i just woke up in the hallway. not my hallway. i officially raise my hand to be DD next week.
I cant prove it..but im almost positive that you were just outside my window watching me while eating out of a bag of Cheetos...
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
you know its summer when you wake up on the toilet
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
lesson learned.. dressing up like a naughty teacher doesn't mean you can get away with spanking a cop with a ruler for being "fresh" with you
When you pick me up at the airport, please have some sort of drugs on hand.
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
I was going to text you that earlier, but I felt like before 10 was probably to early to bring up boners
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
I got her number but I don't think I'll be able to smash, I was pretending to be British AND I forgot her name
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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