OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
I'm hard boiling eggs, drinking rum, and talking to my 8 year old brother about the 10's times tables. This is what thursday is all about.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
he was too drunk to climb up my loft. i owe my beating teen pregnancy to four pieces of steel
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
but how can he casually chat with my father 8 hours after asking me if i'm a screamer
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
You know you're high when you find yourself sitting on the floor with the refrigerator door open, talking to various foods. Hand gestures and all.
he said to "slap him" after he guessed the time correctly. i did.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
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