at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
I have an asthmatic alcoholic for a roommate. That can't be safe.
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
Someone just told me I have an ass that could kill small children .... Don't know how to take that one
i woke up to something itchy on my head. it was his mustache. he fell asleep face-plant style on the side of my head. WTF?
When I woke up my bed had been moved to the middle of my living room, a hippie was spooning me on one side and a pile of cocaine on the other, did I go through a time warp or are we still in 2012?
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
NOT ALL OF US HAVE THE HANDS OF GODDAMN ANGELS YOU KNOW
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