Dual....:-)
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Sorry bro I thought you were kidding. If I'm actually jerking off I usually said "Just a sec getting dressed" or something
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
I am high playing guitar hero naked. Please don't let me die this way
I had mediocre parking lot sex last night so the night wasn't a complete bust.
I can handle him. I'm made of spite and hot wings.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
Randomize
