I'm scared
There's nothing to be scared of. My penis is average size.
That's what I'm afraid of
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
apparently my buddy was fucking on our couch downstairs so i decided it was necessary to walk downstairs naked in a hockey mask.
Why is there no Netflix category for "I just wanna cry, but I don't have time for a whole romcom"?
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Her mom Is so hot that when she was bending over i just zoned out starin at her ass her dad slapped me on the back an said let me tell you son everything you see here is mine and you had better realize i felt like simba
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