Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
dude. how can brian from family drink at fucking bars? he's a dog and definitaly doesn't have pockets.
I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
my mom just cut me up lemons and limes so i would have some vitamins with my tequlia
literally. a puddle of blood. on the floor. still searching for the source
He sent me $300 worth of sex toys. My clitoris went into hiding after two days.
Can you imagine how doomed are children are? I mean for one they have our genetics and then we will ruin them as parents. It will be the most magical adventure. Let's not start soon, too many adventures at hand that involve immense amounts of alcohol.
TOUCH YOURSELF. DO IT.
I don't think that's how you're supposed to sext
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
FOUND: my underwear in the cabinet above the toilet. What the actual fuck.
What the matter? A girl can't play some Super Mario without being accused of being high?
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
Randomize
