it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Sign out of Gchat. Right now my gchat list is entirely girls I've slept with.. and you. You are fucking up my gchat chi.
i understand you have values and thats awesome, all i want to help you do is forget about them breifly
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
You shouldn't have to. I think you should bust into work like "pay homage to my magical vagina!"
I had sex with him and I blame the Doritos
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
My professor just paused class to answer a phone call from her dog. Im taking shots before this class from now on.
DO NOT TOUCH THE SOAP ITS HAD SOME UNORTHODOX USES WITHIN THE PAST 15 HOURS
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
he was just sitting there in his underwear... and his chewbacca mask...
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
