I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
yes because when i jack off the first person i think about is christina applegate
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
I'm not throwing down for dinner because I plan to have so much tequila I puke it up anyways. How much is a cab home?
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
trying to figure out why the only thing in our freezer is an expired loaf of bread, a white t shirt, and a receipt from taco bell for 37.50 from last Friday
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
thanks for not telling him i named my trumpet after his dick
I think tonight's gonna be the night I wear a go pro while trippin on acid
I'm literally rolling on acid for the first time during Thanksgiving. Help me.
Her mom came down to the basement and took shots with us. She's now passed out in a wheel barrow. This party got weird
i don't care if you are my best friend. does not give you the right to describe how well my sister gives blowjobs.
how about your cousin?
I know right, I would blow him just for the satisfaction he would taste like vodka
Randomize
