can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I lined up everyone's pillows and I'm playing Evel Knievel when I jerk off later.
drinking warm bud heavies i found in the garage and googling how to tell the gosselin kids apart.
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
you woke me up at 7 am banging on my wall.. what the hell
thats the international knock for joint time
So on how many levels of wrong is it that I'm reconsidering my divorce simply because I don't want to go through getting used to shitting around someone again.
You peed up the stairs in front of everyone then blamed it on the dog
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
The stall at this bar had mirrors all around. I just looked at myself take a shit from like 3 different angles
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
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