if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
there's a wings menu taped to my wall. don't tell me i don't have my priorities straight.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Hahhaha I literally just rolled outta bed and went to get beer in my pj's and slippers. God I love graduating
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I had to carry him up the hill while he was wearing nothing but knee high socks and a blue glitter sequin leotard.
Why is this not a picture message?
I drank beer out of a Frisbee and it was all downhill from there...
You kept saying “keke” over and over so I slapped you then you proceeded to ask if I loved you. In case you’re wondering why you have a black eye - Lauren
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Is it still sex if there's no nudity, no orgasms, but the neighbors bang on the wall and ask you to stop? I've honestly forgotten.
Randomize
