Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
We tried to break her futon, I crushed my balls instead. You have one less reason to be jealous that my balls are insanely huge and yours are not.
I don't drink so I see St. Patty's as an LSD type of day. Its like a more hardcore 420
Well, no one has ever described you as a perfectly balanced individual
That's just a really flattering way of saying, "Yes, you're useless, but you have great tits."
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
Is there a word in the English dictionary for impressed, yet disgusted?
I think the word you're looking for is flabbergasted.
Maybe she'll change her mind but the "go fuck yourself" doesn't seem promising
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize