i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I think I'd rather ejaculate tabasco. You'd have to scrape out guacamole.
on the way to work, i saw an empty wine bottle sitting in the middle of an intersection. i thought of you.
i can respect that.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.
Thats like me asking what you think of antisocial polish guys with mysterious rashes
I'm getting offered Candy Crush lives in return for sex. Like wtf.
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He updated Facebook... "Got a new phone today." WHAT ABOUT THE FUCKING KID YOU HAD?!
They call you PBJ boy because you were trying to seduce me with pieces of a peanut butter and jelly sandwich. Successfully might I add.
I don’t want to brag, but vows, morals and will power are no match for my blow job skills
Randomize
