we sang an acapella version of barbara ann to his voicemail...i'm not drinking again until tuesday.
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
going to class with no bra.. is that saying "i don't give a fuck i'm one hour away from thanksgiving break?"
oh god...if the people that live above me killed themselves again then im gonna assume im the worst neighbor ever
tell me there's a reason my bed smells like paint thinner
Walked back to my room from the bus last night and all I see is 3 of my friends on the porch chugging whiskey and then throwing up in unison
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
My boss just high fived me after finding out i made it through lunch rush rolling on molly. To think this guy used to terify me.
Oh okay. That's fine. I'll buy us both dinner when you bail me out
It's a post jail date
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Somehow I became in charge of getting my mother laid? This can't be my life? Lol
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
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