I'm gonna get wrecked tn I might have to keep my phone at home cause I'm sure ill send you really weird txts
She just sent me a txt where every word ended in "zzz", with about a hundred "!!!" and called herself "juicezzz". I need back up.
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
Just because you graduated a semester early, doesn't mean you can take a semester off of drinking. Sorry.
Well it's 2pm. Time for another game of "Who, What, Where". The game where you try to guess who this girl is, what happened last night, and where'd your shit go. I'm going for 1/3 today.
That's better than I've done so far.
I JUST FOUND AN INTERNATIONAL POLE DANCING CHAMPIONSHIP IN SPANISH
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
Hooked up with a girl in the dorm laundry room tonight. And got invited to go to Vegas for free. That's how today's going.
I think my nap took me to another dimension
Someone stole a lamp last night.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
I get off at 11. but they've been letting me go early cuz I've been crying a lot
Randomize
