You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Soooo my gf got the droid and doesn't have BBM anymore, I think its over for her
I'm in Target and the lady in front of me is buying three Summer's Eve douches, a box of fishsticks and a giant bottle of vodka. The sad thing is I get it.
I'm sorry I dragged a dildo (on a leash) into your room last night.
Currently coming up with judgment, the game. Works well on buses, will probably be more entertaining in bars.
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
This reunion sucks. All the confident hot girls from high school are still confident and hot, and none of the fat girls with low self esteem transformed into hot girls with low self esteem.
I generally just try to vote by which candidate I think has the bigger dick. Sorry Romney.
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
So I definitely tried to pay a cab with baseball tickets last night
Don't tell him that you hope he dies in a boring missionary position with his wife. That doesn't go over well.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
Randomize
