I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
It was the gentlest way I could hit on a girl who just got hit by a car
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
if it doesnt flame it aint got game is a bad drinking motto eyebrow-wise.
eyebrows regrow, your balls dont
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Guy peeing and puking at the same time in the women's restroom? So impressed that I can't be offended
I dropped my slice of pineapple on the kitchen floor and was just staring at it about to cry. It was really good pineapple.
Randomize
