I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
My vagina just recognized that song.
its official. the only way for my hair to look good is to blow somebody
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
He told me he loved me and then asked if we could have sex in the snow
So I met my girlfriends dad last night. Or should I say I re-met that mall cop that had to tackle me.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
You declared your undying love to a drag queen, then proceeded to puke into the poor man's purse.
Well, we 69'd in the Jacuzzi. If that tells you the kind of night I had. Neither of us knew we could hold our breath that long. Deff. Most. Dangerous. Sex. Ever.
I had sex with a mask on because I have the flu and I didn't want to get him sick.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
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