Can you send me a pic of you vag, I'm sexting the guy and he wants a pic but I didnt shave
dude are you serious?
I know you already have a pic on your phone
I would go down on you faster than GM stock
I just told a dude I hooked up with last night he was the pick of the litter.
she was carrying the quesadilla around the bar like a security blanket
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
she was talking at me constantly for like 20mins. i kept praying for a brain hernia but it kept not happening...
I want to be ashamed of the things we do this weekend
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
For the record, just because I'm a mess doesn't mean I don't know what I'm talking about when I give you advice. I'm way better at other people's lives.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
Life lesson... stop having side pieces that know each other...ffs.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
Stopping for a booty call on the way to a lunch date... Bad form?
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