Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
meow
WTF. STOP SENDING ME ANIMAL NOISES. ITS FUCKING WEIRD.
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
Shes sitting on the front porch puking in to the pumpkin she just carved...in the rain. I guess pumpkin spice tequila shots wasnt our best idea.
Alright fuck it. Alcoholic Jamie is back and here to stay.
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
Just had a smooth transition from sexting to buffalo chicken dip 😂😂😂
Your skills amaze me
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
death bed.
death patio
stfu you slept on the patio!?!
I'm going to get him a gold star sticker and put it on his dick
There’s so much sex at the hospital I’m beginning to think scrubs were invented to make duty booty easier
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