I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Ha ha. You should see the things I'm doing to my body at Bob Evans.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Seriously, she had fingers that made me thank a god I don't even believe in that I'm gay.
At one point 12 people dressed in care bear onesies were up on stage grinding super nasty, and two of the girl Care Bears were making out.
If this wasn't a hallucination, we need to go to this magical kingdom every night of the week.
I've drank literally 19 beers and am still good. Utah is worthless
I just did a booty-call caliber shave job in preparation for this weekend. Fuck being ladylike; I'm tryna get LAID-ylike
his first act of 2015 was getting stabbed
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
i looked that guy up on facebook. the one who went down on me for two hours
what's the verdict
i've been scrubbing my vag all morning
I've never met a penis that didn't think I was awesome.
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