i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I just want a better ending for myself. Not walking around with one sock on and my bush hanging out.
He's prob getting laid right now and I'm sitting alone in my duct tape shoes.
she ate the whole pudding cup using only her tongue. i'm considering going lesbian for her
I just had a 30 minute conversation about hummingbirds. That high.
I miss high conversations.
Swinging. Is. Amazing.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
This amicable friendliness is dull. We either need to start fighting or fucking around. I'll even let you pick.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
My 1st STD. I feel like there should be a cake for this.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
you bounced a quarter off my butt and it came back hitting you in the eye. karma, bitch.
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
