I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Just got roadhead while going 95. I came for a mile and a half.
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
That haircut screams I'm 35 but I still eat pussy.
She told me she was going to ride me so hard i would cum the ghosts of my ancestors...its gonna be a good time
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
Did you blackout Saturday before or after we had sex in a random snow bank?
Ryan friended me on LinkedIn and it took everything in my power not to endorse him for sexual dysfunction as a skill.
It has moved into the cliche "thin line between love and hate" real quick. With her. Not Taco Bell.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
We could have mediocre awkward sex or mediocre stunted/awkward/uncomfortable banter. The possilities are relatively finite
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
Have you ever seen death before? Bc it's me right now in yesterday's clothes.
Randomize
