The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
There was a reason God said "Let there be titties" on the Fifth Day.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
When a guy invites you to dinner and breakfast the next day it's implied that he's going to make some sweet loving in betwixt correct?
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
Went to open youtube this morning, and the last search was "ten hours of whale sounds" Best pillow talk ever!
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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