This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
halloween costumes for girls are easy, slutty teacher, slutty cop, slutty nurse, etc...
exactly, that's why i want something interesting
slutty neuroscientist?
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
No it's cool, He's been doing my English papers in exchange for lap dances since the eleventh grade. We're very professional.
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Haha keeping the dream alive until Chinese New Year. I'm jobless with stitches in my face.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
I would just like to go ahead and accept my slut of the year award.
It's like 10 times better than an Oscar
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
Instead of texting me to come over, she just sends me a batman symbol.
I don't care if she's a booty call. Marry her.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Randomize
