The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Great. There's a birthday party at work today. Now I can stand around and feel uncomfortable for an hour.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
so, i drunkenly called my religious roomie because i was lost and told her if she couldn't come find me, jesus would condemn her to hell for not leading me to the light .. too much?
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
I just realized my mom and I make the same noises when we have sex. Fuck.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
I don't think my arm is broken I can still text
Apparently you need a permit for a flamethrower.
also karaoke with swedish 7yr old and drunk 50yr old = best idea ever
I know. His dick was small at the top and got bigger at the bottom, like a fucking curling wand.
I was out of weed and my vibrator broke, so I'm now at Red Lobster.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
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