try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
third eye blind makes so much more sense now that i have a drug problem
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
After we drank 3, we built a raft out of the empties and installed the fourth submerged In the water to keep it cool. Keg boats are now a thing
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
I've never said "lesbians" so many times in a short response answer
I just masturbated while watching Say Yes to the Dress
This is what my life has come to
You need to stop showing people the things i drunk-text to you... i have a reputation to uphold here
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
the raccoons are back...
Randomize
