so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
you think she would figure it out that ever dude that fucks her is just doing it bc they are in a contest to bang the fattest girl
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
Neighbor who got arrested at 3am just said he'd split the $ with me if I testify as the witness in his police brutality trial. He was also holding a baby and a case of beer.
I told him to pick up the beer can he threw in front of the police station. So he gets out chugs whatever's left and throws it back and says ok let's go.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Oh yeah. I pretty much fucked the universes brains out lastnight. It was glorious.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
Those people that talk about exercise endorphins have never experienced a 9x13 pan of mac n cheese endorphins
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
As your friend, I promise I will drink a full bottle of vodka and belly slide down the stairs with you if that test is positive
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Randomize