are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
my love horoscope just told me to "say it in frosting" should i take this literally?? i think yes.
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
So Delta doesn't take cash. I used my card to buy a drink and asked the attendant if she could leave it open.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
No I am not eating basil off your cock
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
Phone sex soon? I mean date. Sex date. Date phone.
all 3? possibly?
I think I'm up to the challenge.
It's probably because the lack of alcohol in your stomach. Alcohol kills bacteria. I am a doctor. Trust me
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Was just told that I slept on the counter using a loaf of bread as a pillow. Clearly my life is going well.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Randomize