ya ever know whats down there. always send some fingers in first to scout the situation. fingers are not used for pleasure. they're used for covert missions.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
Please return the baby Jesus and sheep to the quad
her idea of "friends with benefits" is her doing my laundry. i'm cool with it.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I hate him. I fucked every one of his friends AND his fat brother and he still won't break up with me.
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
New drink: empty coke can vodka water maple syrup. Get on my level
How does she have a hairless cat and a husband it's not fair. Both are hard to come by
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Seeing her tonight. She doesn't want dinner, just wants me to come over for awhile. My penis just sent me a thank you card.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Randomize
