It made me feel like I need a reality show of my life so I could go back and watch the episodes to figure out how I got from the trunk of the car to my neighbors tree house...
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
i knew it was time to leave when he woke me up only wearing pooh bear oven mitts and holding a plate of thank you pancakes
just hooked up with an air force officer in a hotel room paid for by the military. i feel like i should go around thanking taxpayers for the assist.
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yelling back at the people on Jerry springer through the TV, and eventually punching it. Failure of a night.
I found some video of you on my camera that's like 5 seconds long, where you announce that you should have been a dentist before taking a bong hit.
She sprained her ankle last night trying to flash me.
Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
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