OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
We didn't need to cut her off. I'm pretty sure the lit candle she almost drank would have done it for us
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
Not only is he in the circus, the man survived a near death experience and has an accent. She might as well have found a unicorn. This shit just doesn't happen in real life. Where did she meet this magical creature?
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
Well if I can't snuggle you, I might as well snuggle a stranger's cat.
Randomize
