I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
Bring booze and chicks. Separate, or one already in the other. Your call.
This house was built for laser tag.
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
And all you did was hit on me and do things "for America", so you weren't judged heavily
Just gave my pregnant cat a safe sex talk. That high.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
I still don’t believe you, the dog DID NOT tear down the shower curtain and shit on the floor.. we found you in the fetal position in the bathroom holding your tequila gun. It was you!
After we had sex he gave me a thumbs up... fucking A&M Aggies, man
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
I'm a peeled potato compared to her. I'm a peeled potato compared to anyone. I'm a peeled potato.
Are you high?
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