Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
Angelique from Rock of Love is now doing phone sex commercials for central illinois....id say she's going places.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
She left scratches down my back from her wedding ring. Her husband seems like a nice guy though, judging by the scratches it had to be at least a carat.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
You should never talk to him again. Unless its you knocking on the door and punching his dick.
today is just not my day... it could be raining penises and I would get hit in the face by a vag
Look. If you get me out of this speeding ticket you can bang my sister. Or my mom. But not both.
Don't remember our skype call last night too well, but did I pee while skyping you?
I just bout myself an edible arrangement for myself and had it delivered to work. I even wrote myself a note. This is a new low for me.
I'm a shining star this evening. Dancing with a cane in rite aid now. I should be kept under survaillance.
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