my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
He has jerked off in so many socks I am surprised he doesn't have athletes dick
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
I'm playing wingman, but I want to pull a Goose and die.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
I need a good cry or an orgasm and neither of them are gonna happen to me and i'm so frustrated
What shade of lipstick clearly states, I'm only attending this wedding for the drugs and groomsmen?
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
Randomize