Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
If no ones going to say it, then I will. Vanessa Hudgens boobs are weird looking
All I remember from last night is puking up a box of cheeze-its and the building catching on fire.
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Boob shaped ice luge is ordered for my bday. Boom
I can't even drink.
The liquor comes out the nipples. Out. The. Nipples.
Made out with a chick in front of a girl I'm banging and successfully reDENNISed her within 9 hours
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
Legit just looked at the gin bottle and said, “Aw fuck, I’m going to feel this in the morning.”
Randomize
