i had a dream the other night i was titty fucking you while you were asleep, then you woke up and didn't care.
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
I remember coming home with a cat... I havent seen it all day. Shit.
Congratulations, you have helped solved the mysterious disapperance of Dani's phone which was found in the munchies cabinet next to the oreos. Your reward is star power as well as a fat ass bowl of Nebula. You may proceed through the wardrobe and into Narnia for your prize.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
My legs feel like baby dolphins
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
Randomize
