THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
im at planned parenthood. the form wants to know what our usual form of contraception is?
anal.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
My vagina is not really on board with my "emotional issues"
When you get home...find me in the shower. Only safe place at the moment.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Anyhow. He gives me orgasms and cuddles and buys me dinner and alcohol. Ill keep him around and cross that other girl bridge when we get there ha ha
I'm literally watching a webcam of the Vegas strip right now and it is making me sad.
Randomize
