My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
i now understand why he chose to have sex with my friend rather then me after lookin in the mirror this morning. and id do the same thing.
the party we crashed was not a party. the party we crashed was jens grandads funeral.
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
We're playing Edward Bottle-of-eight-dollar-sale-wine-hands now
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
found out the liquor store price matches. thus begins senior year of college
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
He stopped in the middle of us having sex and asked "is today Monday?" then went even faster
I am incapable of maintaining a guy's interest in me. It's like erectile dysfunction but with feelings
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
Had the best sex Thursday night then Friday night I met his girlfriend. The worst thing is we became friends like she gave me her number.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
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