I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Google Chrome's "top 8 most visited sites" page has become my motivation to stop masturbating
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
the boys love us. they call us "the stoner girl suite down the hall". not very inspired, but flattering nonetheless
I legit had a 15 minute convo about dinosaurs with a guy at the bar last night cuz he was wearing a jurassic park shirt
I spent most of the stoned conversation with my dad proving to him that the Newfoundland is an actual dog and NOT a Snuffaluffagus-esque figment of my stoned imagination, while laughing over the fact there is actually a place caller Dildo, Canada. Have YOU taken time to be a good dad today?
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
That's the 3rd guy I've made pass out from a bj. I may have super powers.
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
Just saw a fat guy on a flower print moped. He's my hero.
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
Let the healthy eats/juice cleanse begin. Today is day 1
Have you cleansed yourself of the boy yet?
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