Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
Ambien. No doubt about it.
Dude i just saw JT leaving the hospital. He drove there to get fluids because he was too drunk, so they hooked him up to an IV so he didn't get alcohol poisoning. Did I mention he drove there? Oh yea and our roommates in the hospital with alcohol poisoning, she just puked up coal. So many ppl are here, it's like a hospital party, I love spring quarter!
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
please tell me that the half empty jar of cocktail sauce on the table has nothing to do with my missing seamonkeys
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
winnie the pooh came out of nowhere and offered me a burrito...it was a fucking amazing burrito.
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
40s are totally the cure
I spend so much of my life shaving my body hair off and I want nothing more than his beard in all my hairless places.
I was giving you head in the kitchen, and when I looked up you were eating a quesadilla.
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
Randomize
