She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
Just applied online. Cant stop hiccupping. May be drunk. Hope they liked my smiley faces.
there is a baby dancing on the table amidst the smoke of multiple cigarettes. i want to trade lives with that baby.
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
im not going to any frat parties next semester. for once i want them to think its actually hard to get in my vagina
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
In other news, Justin Bieber has a big dick and that makes me uncomfortable.
If you fold the laundry; booze and orgasms on me.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Try me, you 5'5 gremlin
Randomize
