bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
the cops didnt even say happy birthday to me :(
Listen man this isn't about soccer. It's about America and day drinking... Your two favorite things now get your ass over here
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Well that's the second time I've broken a lamp during sex this month. Starting to worry I'm some kind of X-man. (this one was a wall sconce and I fully smashed it with my head and it crumbled like it was made of sugar)
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
Wait... All I had to do was ask for a sandwich and you would have come over
My dog is now used to me drunk singing and sleeps through it. I don't know how I feel about this
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
I need to get off of her emotional roller coaster. I've been on it for a fucking year and I've been throwing up the entire time.
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
Good friends chat about sex - great friends ask about safe words.
He was more upset that I got into his phone than about getting caught cheating.
Randomize
