we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
I just fell down my stairs. I know that you are 6 hours away but please come pick me up. I promise I will still be here on the stairs.
she made out with a stripper. how was scrabble night with your girlfriend
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
I got drunk and tried to make special rice krispie treats, but I made a mess and they were all stuck to my hands, so I just decided to eat my way out of the catastrophe and I think shit's about to get even weirder than usual.
I convinced a German girl that I was born while my mom was water skiing and I preceded to barefoot ski behind her via the umbilical cord...
She just called at a dance party, and you stopped mid puke to join. Another successful night.
I just woke up to my family in the living room watching our security camera tape of me last night talking to a stop sign in our backyard... How the fuck did I get that in the yard?
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
You sat down in the middle of the road and started crying. We told you "Get your ass up or we're leaving you here." You replied "They'll findddd meeeeee" and ran after us.
My boss couldn’t find her phone so she asked me to call it and when I found it the screen said Fuck Toy was calling. I’m very much okay with this
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