so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
Just met a girl...She is complaining why on facebook you can't have more then one "open relationship"
I dont know how i feel about her from a moral standpoint...
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
the condom is still stuck, that's what I get for being responsible
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
I just jacked off to nostalgia.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
If he flies out here I will sleep with him. I have morals, but not when it comes to southern accents
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize
